December 27, 2007

i am a joke

while i was doing the dishes tonight, i was thinking about this time that i answered the phone. it was for my dad and he wasn't home at the time and so i was like can a i take a message? the guy asked who i was and i told him. then he was like i have never heard of you..... who actually tells you that? thanks a lot that makes me feel GREAT! you should never tell some one that. i don't care if you have heard of me or is just plain RUDE to tell someone that. it ended up being some swim coach.
so then after that i started to think about how i am the joke of the family. mom and dad are both smart and have great jobs and all that. sister is super smart and skinny and great swimmer and athlete. brother is smart and a pretty good swimmer and skinny. and then look at me. lets just say i can swim. i am average in brains. and then my body......lets just say i am not skinny but i am not that fat like the people on tv who can barely walk or get up or whatever. i am no where near that but i am no where near skinny. somewhere in the middle. i am not someone who is ever going to get asked out or anything. can you believe i am 21 and have never been kissed or been on a date? i went to prom dateless. at least i got to go in a group thought. but i am the family joke. my parents are just hoping i can get through college. i am a senior in college with no idea what to with my life. i don't even know what degree to get.
i am going to stop there. i don't want to be one of those people that just complains on their blogs. i am not even sure if people read this anyway. it doesn't even matter anymore. i just need to disappear.

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